I walk fast

I walk fast, especially when I am walking alone.

In my memory, there are only two friends that I feel who walk significantly faster than me.

While walking alone, no matter what situation it is, where I am, whether I am familiar with the surroundings, I do not feel obliged to be afraid. There is reasonable amount of caution, if course.

Things are quite different when I have company.

Walking in a large group on the road is worth researching. Firstly, I hate when we or some others are blocking the whole width of the road, so I tend not to walk side by side if there are already some doing so. As a result, in these years I am the one who walk behind the major crowd, sometimes ahead, if there is need to overtake them. It may feel a bit inferior from time to time, and I might be discouraged to talk more due to that kind of feeling. I remember that, four years ago, I was the person in “excited Saturday” mood, walking side by side with close friends, both arms on their shoulders.

Another interesting point is that if I walk ahead, I cannot help but frequently look back. This happens in many occasions, since if I was not walking with an intimate friend or engaged in continuous conversation, I may be walking ahead a few meters due to my usual walking speed.

But why looking back? Originally it could be a sense of responsibility. Back in years when I was leading a group of classmates or teammates on the road, it was my duty to ensure that no one was left behind. This also applies when I was walking with close friends. A later theory was that there might a sense of insecure. It means that I might not want to be alone. Even if I am in advantage position, I do not want my companions behind me, which worries me. However, weirdly, I do not have that bad type of loneliness while actually walking alone. It only happens when I do have someone walking with me.

Confidently walking alone is a happiness, so is having someone walking side-by-side. In former I feel adventurous and curious to unfold future; in latter it is my honor and privilege to treasure our comradeship.